You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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