your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
