My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
