In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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