waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Randomize
