And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
