a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Randomize
