Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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