hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
just tell him i said nine months
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
