i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I have feelings that need drinking.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
