Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
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