why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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