I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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