So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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