i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that š I went with "no"
Welcome to your 30ās, where every one night stand is most likely with someoneās father
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Iām torn. Sheās crazy - like legitimately āWear your skin as a suitā crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
