i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
