i don't like sucking hair
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Boobs speak an international language.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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