Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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