just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize