sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
