I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
