what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
my poor anus
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
