i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
