my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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