i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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