I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Randomize
