Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
