The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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