i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
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