so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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