There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
