There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
