i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Randomize