we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
