We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
