It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
i now understand why vodka
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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