Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
well you can't waste a boner
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
