God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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