And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I need a hoe opinion
go on
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
