so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Randomize
