The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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