bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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