Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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