Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
