when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
