apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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