Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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