Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
