wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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