It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
